Kayoh @ 190

I have seen the sun rising and setting over and over throughout the years. Sadly, their beauty gets taken for granted far too often and it takes something special to grab my attention again. The sunset or sunrise is always at it’s best when blended with clouds, mountains and thunderstorms.  I was able to take this photo right after a thunderstorm had passed through and while the sun was setting. Once again I am reminded that the view from my office is truly amazing.

Saw this in the Denver airport and was lucky enough to capture the image of a pilot and his little girl sitting on his flight kit rolling along on the moving sidewalks…

Through the years I have been mistaken for being a flight attendant more frequently than I would like to remember. I have even had my own crew look at me with a puzzled look on their face wondering why they have an additional flight attendant on board that isn’t required by the FAA. Most assumptions are quelled when I make a left turn after walking onto the airplane and enter my office, the cockpit.

I am a little more lenient on the average passenger as most of them don’t know what the various uniforms and insignia mean.  All they see is a woman in a uniform of some sort which usually translates into “flight attendant”.

I have been handed trash, people’s coats that they want me to hang up for them, dirty diapers and slightly used vomit bags usually accompanied by a sheepish look of apology. I accept all of these things with a smile on my face, and do what needs to be done with them.

Last week, however, I was handed a full plate of fried chicken. Yep, fried chicken.

There was one seat left in first class and so the gate agent upgraded this nice looking gentleman to the big comfy seat. As he was moving up, he stuck his plate of fried chicken toward me and told me to put it away for him. For some reason I just stood there and looked at him. Didn’t say a word. He does it again. Sticks his plate of fried chicken in front of me and says, “Here, put this away”. The flight attendant who was working first class that day quickly stepped in and told him that she would look, but that she really didn’t think she had room. He comes back with “well they always put it away for me on every other flight”. At this point I just turned around and went right back into the cockpit. A move I feel slightly guilty about, having left the flight attendant alone to deal with this fine man.

I am not sure why the fried chicken elicited such a response from me. Perhaps it was just his execution, or lack thereof, that bothered me. But for some reason, I just could not go along with being handed the chicken. It just felt rude.

Fear is a part of life. Fear of heights, fear of water and most definitely fear of flying. Getting on a commercial airplane for some people is an extremely nerve wracking experience usually handled with pills, alcohol or just the simplicity of holding someone’s hand. Even with this fear, people face it knowing that otherwise it would take them a week of driving or riding the train to get them to where they want to go.

I always encourage fearful flyers to talk to the pilots whenever possible. For one thing, I have seen a person visibly feel better and more relaxed as they are about to go back to their seat. I guess just talking to the pilots and knowing who is up there helps. For another, meeting a passenger who is nervous about flying stays with me throughout the flight. Most of the time pilots do not interact with the passengers, so if I have a face in my mind of a person who is experiencing anxiety over being on my airplane, I will do everything I can to make sure that flight is as smooth as humanly possible. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t, but I will definitely put in the extra effort.

That all being said, I just had an experience with a passenger that I have no idea what to think.

While getting ready for a flight during passenger boarding, the flight attendant comes up and says that she had someone who was scared of flying and wanted to talk to us.  When she came in the cockpit, she was crying and sniffing and generally freaked out. A petite girl in her early twenties just crying her eyes out because she had to get on an airplane. My heart really went out to her.

She took another step closer to us and said “I know that over 90% of airplane crashes are the pilot’s fault, so please don’t kill me”.

(This is the part where you insert the screeching tire sound)

After picking our jaws up off the floor, both of us took turns trying to calm her down and explain that we didn’t want to die either and we would do everything we could to make the flight as smooth and safe as possible, but to no avail. She kept throwing various airplane crashes at us and telling us how it was all the pilot’s fault that these people died and that she didn’t want to die.

The kicker of it was that she has been flying quite a bit commercially since she was two years old. She knew what to expect. She knew if something sounded different than normal when the airplane was climbing or descending. She knew more than an awful lot of people do about airplanes.

After a few minutes of this, any nugget of nurturing female compassion on my part went out the window and I was seriously trying to figure out how to get this woman out of my cockpit.  I still think back on it and have no clue what was really going on. If she was really that afraid (I can’t imagine being completely paralyzed by a fear like that), why was she getting on an airplane? Was this to get attention? Did she have any clue that by using that approach to get someone to help you will probably backfire? It was a curious situation.

As far as I know, she was fine during the flight. We never heard a peep about her once she left the cockpit, but that was a conversation I will not forget.

I spent last week in Phoenix training for work. Because we were all out about a year and a half, the company decided to put us all through training again as if we are brand spanking new. The majority of the week was spent being exposed to Death by PowerPoint. Lucky for us all, we made it through with minimal head-nodding. Each day also held a list of guest speakers from almost every department in the company. Most of them would have been much better received had we not actually worked for the company before. So while each speaker was telling us all about how their respective department works with us, it was the perfect opportunity for us to point out just how much their respective department sucks. I almost feel bad.

One department in particular I felt the need to share my feelings with was Customer Service, aka the Gate Agents.

GA- “What you guys don’t understand is the timeline we HAVE to work under. We are so busy and there is so much going on, but we HAVE to close the door 10 minutes early in order to leave on time.”

Me- “Even if there are passengers waiting at the gate?”

GA- “Yes”

Me- “You do realize that the Gate Agents closing the door has absolutely nothing to do with getting an     On-time departure, right? The pilots have to release the brakes to start the clock”

GA- “Yes, but in theory if we close the door 10 minutes early, the flight will leave on time”

Me- “You do realize that we are in the business of actually getting our passengers from point A to point B, right?”

GA- “Yes, but we have to stick to the timeline or we get in trouble”

Me- “Blame it on the pilots, then”

GA- Blank Look

Me- “Ok, how about the times I’ve seen passengers running up to a gate 10 minutes prior for the last flight of the night, but the gate agent won’t let them down and instead starts booking hotels and vouchers. The plane continued to sit there with the jetway attached while we spend money just to not have to open the door.”

GA- “We don’t have the authority to make those decisions. We have to stick to the timeline”

Me- “So there’s no leeway for common sense?”

GA- “No. We must stick to the timeline”

I really hate that. As I was walking past the customer service counter at the airport yesterday, I heard a man say that he still had 4 minutes left and didn’t understand why the plane had left him. It makes me cringe.

I know that most, if not all airlines have a rule like this where they close out the flight XXX minutes early to make sure it departs on time, so definitely do whatever you can to be at the gate and boarding twenty minutes before departure. If a gate agent tells you that you have time to go to the bathroom, seriously look at your watch before going. As a passenger running to connect to another flight, I would suggest trying to get the pilot’s attention if at all possible because if we know you’re there, we will do whatever we can to help. Otherwise, you really are at the mercy of the airline.

The mailman was kind enough to bring my certified letter from the company informing me that I am officially laid off on April 1st. April Fool’s Day????  Seriously?

Since then I have hit the ground running….on the phone, emailing, filling out job applications, sending out resumes, and of course, lest we not forget “Networking”. I have almost become a permanent fixture at the airport chatting with people I know, engaging the people I don’t know.

I am entering the end of one era, and the beginning of another. Should be interesting!

Anyone know of anyone hiring?

I walked up to my favorite Starbucks in the Phoenix airport today where my trusty, loyal and always working barista says “Hi Andrea, do you want your Cinnamon Dolce hot or iced today?”. Um….wow. I realize that I do frequent that particular Starbucks every chance I get when I am in Phoenix (the other locations in the airport just don’t make the drinks correctly!), but it appears that I just might indeed have a problem. Or I need to come up with a new drink selection, and fast!  Any suggestions? And, no “Tall Coffee” does NOT cut it with me-I am not truly happy until I have parted with the $5 burning a hole in my pocket. Mind you, this weird must-have Starbucks fixation that I have only happens when I am working. I rarely go there on my off time.

When the barista at Starbucks knows you by the $5 frou-frou drink you order, is that a bad thing?

There is nothing worse than hearing that a plane has gone down. Those few minutes clawing at any information you can get are gut-wrenching. Yet, somehow out on the Hudson river last week while floating along there were many people who managed to barely get wet. Call it what you will, a miracle, luck, act of God- at the end of the day we are all grateful that what was most probable to happen did not happen that day.

As I sit around the airports killing time and people watching, it is so nice to overhear conversations of thanks and gratefulness and respect- something we airline pilots have not experienced in quite some time. On one hand, it is really sad that it takes an accident like this one to earn some respect amongst the traveling public…on the other hand, I’ll take what I can get!

Part of my job includes a bit of PR duty, especially with the kiddies. Not too often, but every once in awhile when we’re getting ready for the next flight, a child will come up to the cockpit and take a look around. Most of the time, they are shy and don’t really know why Mom and/or Dad made them go visit the scary pilots in the front of the big airplane. Usually, I just let them sit in my seat and ask Mom if she has a camera, then a few pictures are taken, the kid tries to leave as fast as they can while the parents excitedly thank us for giving this experience to their child.

Today, however, was a different and more rewarding experience for me. While in Pittsburgh, getting ready to go to San Fransisco this little boy showed up in the cockpit all by himself and started talking to us. The guy I was flying with did the usual of offering up his seat, which the boy promptly climbed right on up and started having a great time playing with the various controls and buttons.

We find out that his name is Noah and that he has flown on Northwest, Air Canada, and Japan Airlines to name a few. Noah is a world traveler at seven years old. He then asks us what would happen if we ran out of gas. We tell him that we have enough gas to fly for six hours but our flight will only take four and a half. To which he counters with, “yeah, but what if you still run out?”.

Somewhere in there, Noah’s Mom appears and talks to us for a few minutes and during that time I watch as Noah figures out how to strap himself into the five-point seatbelt harness as well as how to get the seat to move around (very impressive, took me awhile and this little guy is seven!).

It may not be much, but Noah reminded me of when I was a little girl flying out to visit Grandma. I always asked to go see the cockpit (when you could actually do that in flight), and was so excited when I got back to my seat. It was such a treat for me to see that kind of excitement and curiosity in a child.

Of course, being the smartass that I am, when Noah and his Mom were turning to go back to their seats I just couldn’t resist:  “So Noah, have you ever been to a Turkish prison?”  Luckily, the adults all got a laugh from my Airplane reference and the look on Noah’s face was priceless

One thing I absolutely must address is carry-on luggage. As I travel to and from work, often I board early, get settled in, and have the privilege of people watching as everyone else boards the airplane. It is very interesting at times

Alright, so we now have this new reality of airlines charging for checked bags. That is just the way it is now, and so to compensate, people have decided to try to carry on everything they possibly can with them so as to avoid said airline fees. (I don’t blame them one bit, I would too.)  There are, however, a few issues to think about for those trying to take the kitchen sink with them on an airplane.

a) I have seen gate agents get medieval on passengers who try to sneak on with more than the “allotted” one roll aboard and one personal item. That’s just no fun for anyone. The gate agents don’t like to have to be jerks (most of the time), the passengers certainly don’t like to be singled out in front of a crowd, and I as the observer cringe watching this exchange. So, if you want to take the kitchen sink, please make sure it will fit in one of the two items you are allowed to take onboard.

b) It is important to realize that everyone, and I mean EVERYONE else getting on that airplane has also decided to carry-on everything that they possibly can, and there is only so much overhead space.  So, as I have ranted about before, it is imperative to check in early and find out that particular airlines’ boarding procedure so that you can be amongst the first to board and therefore snag the coveted overhead bin real estate. It is not uncommon for the overheads to fill up half way through boarding, and then the gate agents have to come down and “gate check” everything that won’t fit on the plane. This may or may not cost you a trip to baggage claim anyway when you get to your destination.  This situation makes everyone grumpy too.

c) Just for posterity, I will rant about the non-use of the space under the seat in front of you. Seriously, people, why on earth are you putting your purses and laptops in the overheads??? 1) Higher chance of damage. Starting and stopping an airliner takes a lot of energy which means everything in an overhead bin moves around creating a higher chance of the big suitcase slamming into the delicate laptop. 2) Higher chance of theft. (yes, people steal stuff on airplanes).

On my last flight home a couple of days ago, I witnessed a man getting very unruly with the flight attendants, and at the end of his “I hate this airline” rant he says “The airlines just aren’t fun anymore”. This comment did catch my attention because he was absolutely right! Airlines have simply become a mode of transportation, and unfortunately expecting more than that will only lead to grave disappointment.